Sunday, April 08, 2012

Easter Parade (or rather, walk)

The cherry blossoms along my street and in Hamilton Park are out.


I went for a walk among them today, on Easter, because I felt so glum being upstairs in the brownstone alone.

Last year, I had to take a bus from Limbe to Yaounde, Cameroon on Easter, which was fine, but I was a little disappointed that I didn't find any chocolate bunnies when I got there.

Today, it didn't even occur to me to think about chocolate bunnies. It barely occurred to me to eat.

Homecoming is so bittersweet...it's relaxing and easy, and you get to see friends, but also, I am always reminded how I'm alone at home too, not just on the road.

I did get to see Roberta early in the morning and we had a sudden jaunt to Home Depot, but later in the day I became engrossed in projects, and forgot to go outside at all until it suddenly occurred to me that it was Easter and I didn't have any plans. None at all.

I wandered around downtown J.C. for a bit, wistfully wishing for the days when I had too many buses to catch, too many visas to acquire, to wonder how I got to where I am.

Anyway, it's no mystery. You really can't have it all. My choices—made long ago when I had a hankering for new worlds and the thrill of the open road—these have defined me and will continue to do so, long after I've wished they'd stop doing so.


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