Saturday, August 12, 2006

New House


I want one of these. It's small enough for Henry the Ford to pull. Maybe I can sell my apartment and live in my garage in a T@b instead.

13 comments:

Marie said...

Or I guess I could forget the T@b and just go straight to living in the garage.

Amanda Castleman said...

No, no, let's drive a hippo-painted T@B across Australia seducing Germans!

Anonymous said...

Optional Features:
-Port-a-potty (stores in cabinet)

Who needs a turlet anyway?

Marie said...

Hey, that's what the gym is for.

Actually, the assumption is that you'd be using this in a campground, not a garage. Maybe I could stay in the campground over by the Liberty State Park Marina for the warmer months. For that matter, I should probably forget the T@b and the garage and just live on a boat. And if I get bored with the NYC skyline, I can take my house with me to live somewhere else.

Marie said...

Ax wants us to drive a hippo-T@b cross Oz seducing Germans in order for her to kick her Curse of the Exes and my Curse of the Hippo. But of course.

Amanda Castleman said...

For those unschooled in the “Castleman curse,” 75% of my exes migrated to Australia. Fifty percent proceeded to shag Germans. The sample size ain’t large, but, golly, it is consistent.

Several friends believe I’m trapped in a karmic loop until I go walk-about with a handsome Teuton…

And if I can help Marie by searching for cursebreakers in a hippo-painted T@b, so much the better!

Marie said...

I'm game. This hippo thing needs to be stopped before it get any more out of hand. Just a pity it had to be Oz, as I've walked about there pretty thoroughly already, and done the German thing to death as well... but maybe there's something to this, as the last good-and-decent-and-honest man I dated was from Oz.

Sara Kocher said...

Only Amanda's curse requires shagging a German, so you can choose among the rest and leave the Teuton-nookie to her. Are there any good, handsome, intelligent Aussies with pet hippos? Ideal.

Love the T@b...I want one, too, and I haven't been camping in way longer than I'd care to admit. I didn't look at the price, though, since reality has a way of throwing cold water on my travel plans.

Marie said...

The T@b price did indeed bring my roaming plans to a screeching halt. $14,000 seems a bit much when I already have a perfectly good tent that was a mere 1/200th the cost. But seriously, camping is awesome and I highly recommend the low-impact kind for the family situation. There are plenty of state parks that have bare-bones cabins, perfect for wee toddlers who might not be up to tent camping yet.

As for the Aussies and Teutons et al, to be honest, I think I'm retiring from the grief of the dating scene. Too soul-destroying. All the old women on my street seem perfectly happy alone and with only each other for company. I'm going to start hanging out with them more.

There's still hope for Amanda, though. I think it's easier to find a German in Oz than a man with a pet hippo.

Amanda Castleman said...

Teuton nookie. Ha! At least my cursebreaker now has a prefab nickname, thanks to Sara.

Marie, since you've been so DIY with the condo (pity about the squeeze-out), may I suggest grooming an appropriate man for hippo ownership?

Tips here.

My fave: "Consider, do you really want to groom hippo nose and ear hair? A tick bird could prove helpful here."

Marie said...

Well, I don't know. Groomed or otherwise, I seem to get better results with condo renovations than with men, who only produce trauma.

Except for friend-men, which are a different, wonderful, dependable species. The worst promise they won't keep is "I'll meet you at noon." The worst lie: "That's muscle weight, not fat weight."

No more nookie-men. Verboten. Removed. Forgotten. Won't-be-fooled-again.

Hippo ownership, on the other hand, I can get behind.

Maybe you'll find a half-Aussie/half-German in Norw

Marie said...

Norway. (what happened to the rest of my word?)

Amanda Castleman said...

Maybe it tailed off into a lustful drool, while contemplating chiseled Nordic types?